Every once in a while, on my way home from the gym in the mornings, I’ll get myself breakfast. Nothing crazy. I’ll get egg whites and turkey in a whole wheat wrap. It’s amazing. Well, at least to me it is.

I would say one out of every ten times I order this it gets messed up. Usually, they throw in cheese. I don’t like cheese except on pizza.

It’s very frustrating as I’m all set to eat my breakfast. I have my little protein shake. My paper and my egg white and turkey wrap. It’s a beautiful thing.

I open it and boom there is cheese. I won’t eat it. Not even for health reasons. I just don’t like it. I then have to make my own egg whites, which I usually do anyway, but it’s annoying to say the least.

I’m paying $4.00 for something that would cost me about 60 cents to make myself.

The next time I go back to the place, I’ll usually tell the manager after I emphasize egg whites and turkey only. See, I used to request egg whites and turkey and NO cheese. Bad move and I quickly realized it.

These grill guys hear cheese and it’s going on there whether I want it or not. It used to happen to me when I would ask for no cheese on my hamburgers.

Anyway, I must say that every time, except once, the manager of the particular place has apologized and made good on it by not charging me.

This is refreshing and smart. $4.00 and the principle of my anti-climatic breakfast is worth more to me (or caused me more hassle) than it is to them.

Hats off to the managers at Pax Whole Foods and Teresa’s Gourmet for passing my accidental egg white and turkey test.

Maybe when you Google your business this will come up and you can reward your managers for doing the right thing.

It’s happened before!

For those keeping score at home…I moved. I now live on 61st between 2nd and 3rd avenues in NYC. Moving anywhere is a huge hassle but especially in New York!

Most buildings require you to go through a broker but dealing with a broker is like having to use some one else’s hands to eat but they are too busy doing something else. The person knows you are hungry but they could care less. In fact, not only don’t they care but they will try to take all of your food too.

I went through 4 different brokers because all of these people forgot to do one important thing: Listen. They wanted to show me apartments that they wanted to show me. Not apartments I wanted to see.

I don’t appreciate having my time wasted. And in the end I didn’t even use a broker.

Being a broker must be a tough gig. No one wants to deal with you and most people don’t value your service. I’ve never met anyone who was happy to pay their broker. I’ve also never met anyone who has recommended their broker.

“Adam, I have this guy. You must use him. He only charged us a $35,000 broker fee and get this…he even waived the application fee for us!” Doesn’t happen.

What if your broker met you where you wanted instead of you having to go to their offices that are usually far away from where you want to look? What if she took you out for lunch? You sat down and she genuinely and sincerely wanted to learn more about you and why you’re moving. She’d also learn about my budget and where I wanted to move and what days and times are good for me to check out places.

Depending on your situation she would say something like, “Yes. I know moving sucks. But listen. I am going to be 1000% committed to making this as painless as possible for you. I know. Believe me. But, just know that I won’t stop until we find something that you totally love.”

Or she might say something like, “Wow! That’s so exciting. Congrats! So moving in with the girlfriend huh? That’s great. This is so exciting and I want to find a special place for you two. I’ll make it happen. You have my word.”

Or, “I know. I know the city is big. I know it can be overwhelming but you remember when you were overwhelmed at first by high school? Now look at you. Before you know it, you’ll feel like you own this place. Now, tell me. What do you think you like and where do you think you want to live?”

She’ll also say something like listen, “I know the rates we and all brokers charge are very expensive. But I want you to know one thing. I will break my back for you. I am determined to find the best possible place for you for the least amount of money. Your happiness is my goal.”

Once the quick lunch is over she’d say something like, “Okay Adam, so let’s meet on Sunday at 11 AM because that’s the most convenient time for you. I will have at least 10 places to show you and all of these places will meet your exact specs because I don’t want to waste your time.”

I would leave our initial meeting relieved and feeling that I am in very good hands. I’d also have high expectations.

But here is where the magic happens. If she actually delivers on her word then she will get a lot of referrals from me and not because I have to but because I want to. I (and most everyone) appreciates when someone goes out of their way for them.

Here is a girl that is going above and beyond and taking something that is painful and making it stress and pain free.

Three weeks later, I’d get a letter in the mail congratulating me on my new apartment with a gift card to a place like Best Buy or Bed Bath & Beyond or Home Depot. (The expensive broker fee can easily justify that.)

That’s a broker I would have loved to use and would have gladly paid.

It’s the little things that really count. Always.

One of my clients wrote that to me this morning after we exchanged emails about some challenges she was dealing with.

It made my day. Every time a client writes something really nice I save it. I have over 1000 really nice compliments. The types of compliments that you read over and over again when you need some inspiration.

I am a sucker for praise. Who isn’t?

But it’s amazing how many people feel under appreciated. I’ve read in countless management books (and I know first hand) that a thank you goes a long way. A sincere thank you though. A heart felt thank you.

How many times have you spent your hard earned money somewhere and been treated like your money doesn’t matter. Treated as if they could care less about you. I hate it. We all have so many choices and options available to us. Why in the world would I spend my money with you if you don’t give a shit? Maybe you do.

But I don’t know that unless you tell me or better yet show me.

I tell my clients how much I appreciate them from time to time. They allow me to do what I love doing. This is what I want to with my life.

I would go to the moon and back and back again for my clients. I am NOTHING without my clients. I don’t have a business unless I have clients.

We all like to feel appreciated. Even Grandma Ester for her ‘famous chicken cutlets’ likes to feel appreciated.

It’s comments and praise like this that keeps me going. This is why I know my program will change the world. This is why I know I’m onto something absolutely huge.

2 things for you to do today.

One: If you are a business owner email or call your clients. Tell them how much you appreciate their business. I can’t remember the last time I got an email from a company simply thanking me without ANY sales pitches.

Two: If you are not a business owner email or call your loved ones. Tell them how much they mean to you. How much you appreciate them.

I bet it’ll make their day.

Just like this made my day!

[1 hour after writing this a client writes me this: “I increasingly feel the need to trumpet your program from the rooftops. I was actually tossing around your business model (from what I’ve seen of it) and was trying (for the hell of it) to poke holes in your approach. I guess I’m just floored that you’re the first person/this is the first program to ever begin to make a dent in my ingrained bad behaviors.

I’m EXTREMELY strong minded, and tried-and-true therapists and outpatient clinics couldn’t make a dent in my “bad coping mechanisms”. Also, I’m wearing the clothes I wore when I was absolutely killing myself at the gym for hours every day, and not eating. The power of consistency is mind blowing.” ]

Wow! I really do have the best clients in the world. And thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart to each and every single one of my clients for allowing me to do what I absolutely love doing!

By the time you read through this you will understand Tenjooberrymuds…

The following is a recent hilarious yet scary telephone exchange I had with room-service in America mind you:

Room Service (RS): “Morrin. Roon sirbees.”

Me: “Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.”

RS: ” Rye Roon sirbees…morrin! J oowish to oddor sunteen???”

Me: “Uh….. Yes, I’d like to order bacon and eggs.”

RS: “Ow July den?”

Me: “…..What??”

RS: “Ow July den?!?… pryed, boyud, poochd?”

Me: “Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. scrambled, please.”

RS: “Ow July dee baykem? Crease?”

Me: “Crisp will be fine.”

RS: “Hokay. An Sahn toes?”

Me: “What?”

RS: “An toes. July Sahn toes?”

Me: “I… don’t think so.”

RS: “No? Judo wan sahn toes???”

Me: “I feel really bad about this, but I don’t know what ‘judo wan sahn toes’ means.”

RS: “Toes! Toes!..Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?”

Me: “Oh, English muffin!!! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘toast’… Fine…Yes, an English muffin will be fine.”

RS: “We bodder?”

Me: “No, just put the bodder on the side.”

RS: “Wad?!?”

Me: “I mean butter… just put the butter on the side.”

RS: “Copy?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

RS: “Copy…tea…meel?”

Me: “Yes. Coffee, please.. and that’s everything.”

RS: “One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy… rye??”

Me: “Whatever you say.”

RS: “Tenjooberrymuds.”

Me: “You’re welcome.”

Have you ever experienced anything like this? For some reason many companies believe customer service is an expense.

Wrong!

Customer service is a profit center. You do right by your customers and they’ll go out of their way for you.

They say when in Rome do as the Romans do. How about when dealing with English speaking clientele speak English!

Jud unda stang?

(Disclaimer: I am not a racist or anything close to it. Just stating the facts here folks.)

Thanks for stopping by. Call me crazy but I’m going to assume that if you made it this far you enjoyed my article. I’ll be writing a regular column for Millionaire Blueprints Teen so be sure to look out for it.

I also write frequently right here on my blog. Anything business and life is fair game. I know. That’s like saying the problem with infinity is that there’s too much of it.

But most of my articles deal with business in some way, shape or form but I don’t like to be restricted.

My job is all about your most favorite person in the world: YOU!

My duties include but are not limited to: making you think, inspiring you, entertaining you, motivating you and maybe, just maybe, teaching you a thing or two.

I can assure you of several things. I don’t know all of the answers but I can help you ask the right questions. You have a major advantage over many people. Your thirst for knowledge will help you tremendously. You have a long leg up on most people.

If you’re already craving more GuruGilbert and can’t wait until my next article fret no more.

On the right hand side of this blog there is a link entitled ‘favorites’. Grab a comfy seat, some good nosh and have yourself a party. And if you don’t feel like moving I can even hand deliver each of my posts right into your inbox.

I love hearing from my readers so don’t be shy.

For you to be as astounded as I am you have to read this post first which I wrote a few months ago.

Yesterday, Nancy writes, “Glad you enjoyed the singing waitress at Verdi’s. She happens to be my mom (Adrianna) and is thrilled that you have written about her. Next time you are visiting Grandma, go see Adrianna again. My mom has had a very interesting life which would make a great story if you wanted to write about it! She’s 80 years old and has been at Verdi’s over 30 years carrying trays, serving people, and singing her heart out.”

-Nancy Porcelli

I was absolutely amazed and I replied to her email immediately asking how she found my article.

Nancy writes, “My mom called me this A.M. and told me that her boss, Josephine Femia, googled her name and found your article. That’s how I found your blog. My mom is like a female version of Leo Buscaglia. She is such a positive person even though she has had a lot of adversity in her life. It would make a great story.

Her other daughter Linda writes, “Loved your blog about my mom, Adriana. Just one correction though, Nick & Josephine had nothing to do with the planning of this, this is my mom ALL the time. She’s such a positive person that customers actually have told her that they come in just to feel better. She genuinely LOVES life, even though hers has been less than positive. Thanks for the story!”

PS: I’m her other daughter in Fort Lauderdale

3 powerful lessons here:

ONE: Most people never say anything if they like something. You definitely have customers or you definitely are a customer of many places because they do something a certain way.

If they changed that certain thing you might stop going. For example, when I go to the diner under my building and order my grilled chicken sandwich or turkey burger, every single time, my man, Sammy, brings me like 10 pickles. He knows I love pickles and I don’t even have to ask him for extra pickles anymore.

Most people are too busy to say something nice. But if you believe in what you’re doing and people are coming back and referring you then don’t stop what you are doing!

It could be the smallest thing that people really enjoy…the free prize! (Or, the pickles!)

TWO: Recognition is very nice. However, if you’re in business to be recognized you’re in the wrong field. If you are doing what you love day in and day out then people will take notice. Not because you ask them to but because they want to recognize you.

THREE: Have fun with what you do. If you don’t love it quit. You will never succeed if you don’t love what you do.

Adrianna is successful because she loves making people laugh and feel great and singing her heart out. Mark Zuckerberg is successful because he loves connecting people. Bill Gates is successful because he loves software. Sergey Brin and Larry Page are successful because they love organizing information. Steve Jobs is successful because he loves innovating. And on and on and on…

Your template: I am successful because I ____________and I _____________and I_____________and although people may not really say anything to me I keep getting raises, I keep getting new clients and people continue to refer me and are wanting to work with me.

Thanks Nancy for emailing me and we’ll definitely do a follow up story about your Mom soon.

P.S. Tell your mom to leave a pitcher of water for me with extra lemons on the table next time. I love lemon water and I hate bothering waiters because I used to be one!

The iPhone is generating some amazing buzz. The big day is June 29th…

I believe Apple is on the verge of another grand slam. Industry experts are all over the place with this thing though.

Steve Ballmer (Microsoft) says, “There’s no chance that the iPhone is going to get any significant market share. No chance.”

My prediction: In 2007, Apple will sell 1.5 million phones. And even more in 2008.

I want this phone. Badly.

But wait. Good ol’ Verizon has me [insert Akon’s “Locked up”…they won’t let me out] for another year.

Check this: I read a story about a company’s CEO who was very adamant on being completely honest with his clients and employees. He wanted the best for them.

When potential clients came to him and he didn’t think he could help them meet their objectives he’d tell them. When he came across remarkable jobs with challenges, compensation and benefits he couldn’t offer he’d tell his employees about it.

Wow! Imagine that.

Your boss telling you about a job he thinks you’d be interested in while turning away potential business.

If your boss is that honest and sincere you wouldn’t want to leave.

If Verizon actually cared about their customers instead of acting like a monopoly then they wouldn’t have countless people ranting about their awful service.

Now, if Verizon really cared about their clients and really believed they had “America’s most reliable coverage” they should (and would) let their customers go and try Cingular and be confident that they will come back.

I want this iPhone and Verizon is holding me back.

I resent you Verizon. I really do.

Once again, can you hear me now?

As yesterday was torrentially pouring, I learned a valuable business lesson.

In today’s hyper cluttered, super busy world we all are extremely loyal to brands.

Or are we?

Some people wouldn’t switch for anything, no matter how cool, expensive and exclusive it may be. Others are always looking for a bargain and don’t really care what the tag or label says. And some are constantly in search for the next best thing. These early adopters become the trend setters.

We are in such a low trust world, no one believes anything anymore!

There are more scams, more emails from Africa claiming that I’m going to be a millionaire and not enough time to sort through all the clutter.

People practice professional skepticism. (Oh my God, that reminds me of my former career. Excuse me. Sorry. I just threw up in my mouth.)

I enjoy going to the gym in the afternoon and then once in a while getting a whole wheat bagel with Dirty sour cream and onion potato chips and a couple of free pickles from my local deli.

I used to actually get tuna on the bagel but then I realized that I make tuna better than my deli. The key is to really mash it down so it’s very fine. Then, I cut up celery so small it literally won’t come off the knife. Next, I take a carrot and peel off a few slices so they are razor thin. I make sure to cut the slices up into micro pieces.

The crunch from the celery and carrots is so subtle yet so amazing. Add some mayo and we have a party.

It’ll make you part your eye brows with your tongue!

Finally, I let it cool in the fridge for 30 minutes because I can’t eat warm tuna.

I digress!

I don’t have an umbrella. I seem to keep losing them or they keep disappearing. So, all I wanted to do yesterday was run quickly to my deli and spend my $2.00 on my bagel and chips.

I didn’t want to get drenched though. So, I decided I’d ask the parking garage guy if I could borrow his (very visible) umbrella.

“Hola Amigo!!! May I borrow your umbrella? I’m literally going 300 yards to the deli. I just don’t want to get soaked.”

“Ohh no my friend. This isn’t mine.”

“Well whose is it? I just want to borrow it for 2 minutes. I live in this building.”

“I wish I could. I can’t. It’s not mine.”

“Really. That’s strange whose is it?”

“Some guy who just parked his car. He had to run down the street quickly. He’ll be right back.”

“Aww really. Just for 2 minutes man? C’mon. I promise. I’m not going to take your umbrella. What guy is going to run down the street without his umbrella right now? It’s pouring!”

“Ahhh amigo you got me. Okay, okay. For only two minutes though?”

“Yes. I swear. I’ll be right back!”

And this was all to get an umbrella! And he knew where I lived. But in his defense, he didn’t know me from a hole in the wall.

Wait a second. Isn’t that how business works?

Could you get a perfect stranger to lend you there umbrella?

Well, that’s exactly what I do every day for a living. And so does anyone else with a business.

How can you make your product or service as risk free as possible for strangers to give you a chance?

3 things you should do.

1. Stop marketing your product/service right now if you don’t believe in it 1000%. People sense sincerity (or lack of) very quickly.

2. Offer a money back guarantee. If you really believe in what you are doing then you shouldn’t have to think twice about offering a money back guarantee.

3. Include testimonials. People like to see that other people are using (and loving) your product/service. And don’t be afraid to include testimonials that are less than stellar. The more real and honest you are the better. (Note: In my type of business a lot of people are hesitant to include their full name, etc. If that’s the case, be prepared to hand over a list with your clients contact information – of course, you must ask your clients for permission to do this but if you can, that’s impressive!)

So, here’s my question to you. How can you umbrellerize your business?

Boy is my tuna good!

How many traditions does your family have?

Or maybe, you and your friends have a tradition that you love.

As we are becoming more connected and busier every single day we have less time for traditions.

It’s a very dangerous world we have created for ourselves. We are constantly connected and always doing work or at least thinking about work (or at least I am!).

We value traditions less but we need them more than ever!

I bet in ten years people will be more obese than ever. We order out more often and we want everything delivered, right now.

So, for all of you, who have those little traditions I think you should do anything and everything in your power to keep them.

Even, if they are small traditions. For example, in college every Sunday night, my friends and I would always order food and watch the Sopranos. Those little traditions are what make us happy and is what life is all about.

Whether it’s going to lunch with your girlfriends and then getting your hair and nails done every Friday, going to the gym and grabbing some food afterwards, having breakfast with your friends after a long weekend, playing football Thanksgiving Day or eating dinner with your family every Sunday night; these are the traditions that keep us going.

My family and I have a really nice tradition of visiting my Grandpa at the cemetery every 6 months or so; usually around the holidays. We’ll go on a Sunday morning and then go for breakfast afterwards.

I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

The cemetery is in Elmont near the Belmont Park Race Track. It’s very easy to not want to wake up early on a Sunday but it comes down to tradition. It’s very important to me and my grandpa deserves all the respect in the world.

The main reason why I admire him and strive to be like him so much can be summed up in one word: Simplicity. (I’ll write more about him one day because we can ALL learn so much from him!)

We always go to this one diner after we visit the cemetery. Recently the diner was sold from Greek owners to Asian owners. Unfortunately, with the change, off went the waitresses with the great Brooklyn accents and the hilarious stories. That’s part of what you buy when you go into a little diner like that. It’s what makes it so quaint.

We decided we’d stick with the diner even with the change in owners and waitresses.

But this past Sunday, something astonishing was going on. There was an Asian woman sitting at the diner counter walking up to the tables and asking people, “If you want DVD?”

I decided I’d investigate and I realized the owner of the diner was endorsing this!!! I almost spilled my chocolate milk all over the place when I realized this.

Is he out of his mind?

This guy, who most likely made the biggest purchase of his life, of buying what was probably his dream, a diner, is now thinking of ways to make more money from existing customers by annoying and interrupting them.

While enjoying a delicious breakfast the last thing any person wants, is having someone solicit them to see if, “They want DVD?” Literally, every single person in the diner was bothered by this. You could see it in everyone’s face as they rudely said, “No,” or just by watching them shake their heads and talk about it with the people at their table.

Clearly, this guy better stop doing this or pretty soon he’s going to have to turn his little diner into a DVD store.

Obviously, for research purposes I decided I was going to act interested. So when the sweet looking, little Asian lady walked over to my table as I was eating my egg white and turkey omelet and said, “Do you want DVD?” I said, “Sure, what you got?”

(FYI: I’m not racist or anything close to that, I’m literally just repeating exactly what happened and how it was said.)

Immediately, she got really excited and for some reason started showing me every possible mob movie ever created; all as I’m eating my breakfast. (I guess I just appear as someone who’d be interested in mob movies.)

You certainly can’t get more of a captive audience than this.

That’s like me being able to walk around a McDonald’s as a 300 pound guy is eating his fifth Big Mac and tell him about MyBodyTutor.com.

Not possible.

The scary part is that the owner thought this was a good idea!

After about 2 minutes, I told the enterprising young lady with all the mob movies, “No thanks.”

What this diner owner was doing is equivalent to me allowing someone to call all of my precious clients and try to sell them stuff!

If anyone tried to do that to my clients, oh mannn, fuhhh-gettt-abouttt-ittt!

I’d break their f#%king legs and make them an offer they couldn’t refuse. It’d be along the lines of, “Do you want life?”

If you know what I mean.

We’ve all seen Verizon’s commercial with the dorky actor repeating, “Can you hear me now?”

Ironically, for a telecommunications company it’s quite a challenge to get through to an individual. Obviously by design. How do they see this as a benefit to their customers and their bottom line?

Of course, they are the quintessential customer-serving and customer-oriented company.

They certainly love their customers, and definitely convey that attitude to their precious customers.

Like when I just tried to trade in my overpriced Razr for a Treo or one of their other “Blackberry” type devices.

I finally spoke to someone after ten minutes of yelling into my phone and making sure every inflection in my voice was precise for the, yup you guessed, live, human … voice system. No matter how many different scenarios I brought up or how many times I told them I was trying to pay yet even MORE money per month, they wouldn’t accommodate me.

They kept referring back to the contract that I signed about a year ago.

Apparently, I used all of my Verizon luck last year. My old cell phone screen had cracked and my two (2) year contract was going to be ending in 3 months.

I had to literally convince them that not fixing a 21 month old phone that hardly worked (and having to spend $75 to fix it) to spend $400! on a new phone was something they should gladly do for a loyal customer.

I’ve had Verizon since I first had a cell phone my junior year of high school. Apparently, they don’t break rules for great customers like me (pays their bill on time, recommends family members and friends, and isn’t a pain in the ass).

Of course, I educated them about customer retention, acquisition and reminded them of their ever growing attrition and compression rates. They did me a huge favor. I insisted they also give me the notorious $100 credit we all know and love. I told them I’d sign another two (2) year contract.

They agreed. I felt like I defeated the enemy.

John Harrobin (VP of Marketing for Verizon Wireless), I have some questions for you.

When you read that sentence in bold does that make you feel good?

John, I know you know what the lifetime value of a customer means and I’m sure you know how much I’m worth to your company. Right?

According to my LOW calculations I’ve already spent roughly $7700 in my life with you. ($80 / month x 12 x 8 ) Not counting the hundreds, probably thousands, I’ve thrown out in overages.

The (extremely conservative) lifetime value of Adam Gilbert is easily going to be $80,000!!! That’s figuring the rates stay constant and I live until 100. You and I both know only the latter can happen.

Here’s my free advice. There’s no need to hire expensive consultants, run focus groups, or conduct surveys.

Treat your customers the way you’d want someone to treat you.

Don’t make it a challenge for me to try to spend more money per month and become even more dependent on your company.

Rules mean nothing. You bend over backwards to make your customers happy; especially when it’s still highly profitable for you. Even if it’s not. Look at the LTV above. If you have to forfeit a $100, $200, $300, $400 credit to make me happy then do it.

Stop acting like a monopoly. People are starting to switch. I can keep my number.

Your competition is destroying you with much better offers. And very enticing ones. What have you done for me lately?

Offer better phones (and nice work getting the iPhone!). The ones you have are terrible. My Razr has the worst battery I’ve ever had. Fix it. For free! (Why do I have to pay more money to get a battery extender when I was promised my phone would work for countless hours?)

I can go on and on. And so can thousands of your customers.

Listen, John. I don’t want to switch. I’m a loyal a guy. And you shouldn’t want me to switch. But, why do I always have to convince your staff that I’m the loyal customer and that I can go to 5 other different companies with much better phones and prices? Why are you still the most expensive when your competition is killing your prices with better phones?

I think I’m going to switch John. I’m getting sick of this.

Hey John…

Can you hear me now?

Good.