Let’s Help Britney

Unless you live under a large rock you’ve heard about (or seen) Britney Spears’ atrocious performance at the MTV Video Music Awards. Britney blew her chance to make a comeback.

One of the problems with Britney is she keeps doing stoopid things and is making it very difficult for people to pull for her. She did this to herself, but luckily for her, as quickly as she dug her grave she can dig herself out.

So here’s what I’d do if I were Britney.

First off, she needs to go into hiding. The one thing she has going is that people can’t stop talking about her. The more mystique she creates and the more mystery the better.

Everyone thinks she’s a complete mess right now and the more she is seen doing dumb things the more she is going to solidify that belief in people’s minds. And one of the hardest things to do is change a person’s mind.

While in complete seclusion she needs to seriously get her ass back into shape. Some might argue that she looks great for having had two kids. Agreed. But she is Britney Spears! An international superstar who has sold more albums than anyone can dream of.

Part of being an international icon is looking like one. She can’t look like an average person. She’s got to have that “I’m a slave for you” or “Oops I did it again” body, it’s a huge part of her gig.

I think once she does she’ll get back the confidence she was totally lacking at the VMA’s. She needs to believe in herself again.

Once she believes in herself again, like really believes in herself, she’ll have the chutzpah to look some producer in the eye and beg for another chance.

As far as comeback songs, her new song “Give me more” is actually pretty catchy and I’m not too proud to admit I dig it. It’s an upbeat, feel good song. If you like any of her old songs, you’ll definitely like this one.

Once she has another opportunity she has to come out of the gate like the old Britney with snakes, smoke, and of course, her amazing body. If she does that she’ll be right back on the same pedestal she dragged herself off of.

And as much fun as it’s to bring someone down, it’s a lot more fun to root for the underdog (which she is) and see her pick up where she fell off.

Not that I’m losing sleep over this but this is a simple case of marketing. Create the demand by being completely out of the public eye. Restore the product by getting back her amazing body and confidence all while in stealth mode.

And after a little while, start showing tidbits of herself to the public to get people talking again by looking absolutely phenomenal and getting people curious as to what her next move is going to be.

Come out with the new and improved Britney and absolutely kill her next big appearance and Boom! She is back.

That’s what I’d do if I were her. Bitch.