My holiday gift to you: The Secret of Happiness (A Holiday Message)

Today, in honor of this season of giving and joy, I have a special gift for you. It comes not in a light blue box with a fancy ribbon, but in the unadorned text of the message you’re about to read.

It reveals one of the great secrets of marketing, of life, of how to connect with people, and, most of all, how to experience unsurpassed joy any time you wish.

This is my holiday gift to you, a true story that will hopefully touch your heart.

This story is about a father of a disabled child, named Shaya.

This story was originally reported in New York newspapers. It was so touching, it spread like wildfire across the internet, and many began to question, “Did this really happen, or is it just another urban legend?”

Yes, This Story Really Is True.

Well, that’s the amazing part of this story. It is true. In fact, because of all the buzz, a web site called “TruthOrFiction.com” investigated and has reported that, yes, the story is indeed true. It has also been confirmed by a highly respected Rabbi and author, Paysach Krohn of Brooklyn, who says that he personally knows the participants and that every word of the story is true as originally reported.

As I said, the story is about Shaya, a learning disabled boy in Brooklyn.

On weekends, Shaya and his dad like to go for walks. As they do, they like to stop and watch the neighborhood boys play baseball.

On this one Sunday afternoon, as they approached the ball field, Shaya looked up at his father and asked, “Dad, do you think they would let me play?”

Now, this gave Dad a dilemma. He knows his son is learning disabled, very uncoordinated, and has never played baseball before.

But Dad also knows that the neighborhood boys have always treated Shaya with kindness. And he feels that if he, his father, doesn’t speak up for Shaya, who will?

So he walked over to one of the boys and asked, “What do you think about letting Shaya in the game?”

The boy didn’t know what to say, and looked around to his teammates for guidance. Not getting any, he took matters into his own hands. He said, “Well, we’re about to start the eighth inning, and we’re losing by six runs. I don’t think we’re going to win this game, so what’s the difference? Get him a glove and he can play behind second base, in short center field,” which Shaya did with a big smile on his face.

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shaya’s team rallied and scored three runs. But they were still losing by three.

In the bottom of the ninth, they rallied again. They had three runners on base, two out, and it was Shaya’s turn to bat.

Dad wondered, will they even let him bat? But without hesitation, one of the boys shouted, “Shaya, you’re up!” and he was handed a bat.

But as he stood at home plate, it was obvious to all that Shaya didn’t even know how to hold the bat, let alone hit with it.

So the pitcher moved in a couple of feet and lobbed the ball very softly so Shaya could at least make contact.

Shaya swung and missed by a wide margin. Before the second pitch, one of Shaya’s teammates called out, “Hold on, let me help him. Let me show him how to bat.”

This boy came and stood behind Shaya, and put his arms around him so the two boys were now holding the bat together.

The pitcher moved in a couple more feet and again lobbed the ball as softly as he could.

The two boys swung the bat together and managed to tap a soft grounder right back toward the pitcher. Shaya’s teammates yelled, “Run, Shaya! Run to first!” And he took off for first.

But the pitcher pounced on the ball in an instant and could easily have thrown Shaya out at first, ending the game.

Instead, the pitcher took the ball and, with obvious intention, threw it on a high arc way over the first baseman’s head, all the way into the outfield.

Shaya was safe at first. The first baseman turned him toward second and said, “Run, Shaya, run to second!”

But by then, the right fielder had chased down the ball and he, too, could have easily thrown Shaya out, at second.

But he understood what the pitcher had done.

So he threw the ball not just over second base, but way over the third baseman’s head, so far that nobody was going to retrieve that ball.

As Shaya chugged into second base, the opposing shortstop ran towards him, turned him towards third base and shouted, “Run, Shaya, run to third!”

Of course, by now the three runners who had been on base had scored. The game was tied, Shaya represented the winning run, and his teammates were screaming with excitement.

As Shaya rounded third base, every boy from his team and several from the team on the field were all running behind him, cheering him home.

And as he put his foot on home plate, both teams gathered around him, lifted him on their shoulders and cheered him as the hero of the game. He had just hit a home run and won the game.

These boys gave Shaya the thrill of his life. Of course, they gave him something even more precious – their acceptance.

The Secret of Happiness…

Obviously, these boys had either been taught, or perhaps had discovered on their own, the greatest secret of human happiness.

And that is…

We experience our moments of purest joy at precisely those moments when we are causing it in others.

It is a truism of life—whatever we give out comes back to us, multiplied. Which brings me back to the beginning of this message…

If you want to experience some genuine joy, all you need do is take a few moments to spread some around.

So maybe it’s time to call an old friend who needs calling, to forgive what needs forgiving, to let a family member hear some healing words, to write that note that needs writing, to smile an accepting smile at the next disabled person you encounter, or perhaps to just relax in the moment with someone older who’d love your undivided attention for a few minutes, as all living things thrive on attention.

Of course, you may ask, what does all this have to do with effective marketing, the usual subject of my blog?

Nothing, really.

And everything.

As Malcolm Forbes was fond of saying, “In all thy getting, get understanding.”

It’s vital for all of us to understand that our prospects and customers are people, too . . . and people like to connect with others who are unafraid of showing a little humanity, of taking some time now and then to share a laugh, feel some warmth, express some sympathy, appreciation and gratitude, do a favor, help a charity, be a friend.

Whatever your product, however impressive your expertise, people will never care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Every now and then, toss a few pebbles of caring into your pond of contacts. Those ripples of friendship will spread and unfailingly return to you in waves of appreciation and loyalty.

Finally, I thank you for being such a loyal reader and let’s make 2007 our best year yet!

What is wrong with this sign? (And win $10.00 if you know where it is!)

I see this sign every morning walking to work and I always snicker.

It doesn’t make sense and it should be fixed.

Why would I want to eat at the busiest breakfast place in all of New York City?

Who even awarded them with the title of ‘busiest place’ in NYC? And what were they before being the ‘busiest and best breakfast place in NYC’?

Do you want to eat at the busiest breakfast spot in all of NYC?

I don’t.

Is the door constantly opening or is the door always open because there is a line outside the door?

Are my eggs going to be cooked in 5 seconds or 35 minutes?

Is my toast going to be burnt or just be bread?

Is my waitress going to be insanely stressed or do I tell my order to a robot?

“Listen, I don’t really care what you order just say it NOW! Say it quick and let’s go. Move it or lose it hunny. Look at how many people are in here. Just look. Look at the line out the door. It’s a circus. Oh boy, 86 on the bacon. Now what do you want? Or else I need to go to the next table. Let’s go. Quick!”

I’m kind of intimidated just thinking about it.

That’s terrible marketing. Why should I care if it’s the busiest place in NYC?

This is another great example of the ego-centric nature of most marketing. The sign is about the owner, not about the prospect.

Here’s how I’d make the sign:

Voted by our loyal customers as their favorite breakfast spot in NYC with their wallets each and every morning! Don’t believe us? If you aren’t satisfied, breakfast is on us!

(Notice it’s not self-proclaimed and the confidence they (should) have in their product.)

I won’t even start with their claim of being the “best” breakfast place in NYC.

And the irony of it all; I’ve never seen a line of people waiting to be seated.

Check please.

Want to win $10.00? Be the first person to comment telling me what restaurant window this sign is in. If you are right, then I’ll simply email you asking for your address and mail you a check for $10.00. Don’t believe me? Try me!

If you enjoyed this post, get free updates by email or RSS.

Ohhh, now you are going to be nice to me?!

It turns out that being a good doorman and building a great business aren’t so different after all.

A doorman knows everything about our lives. In fact, probably a little too much.

A good doorman actually takes an interest in his customers. He cares about you (his customer). And it’s so easy for him to care because he can see what’s going on in your life.

Think about it. He knows:

What you are doing and where you are going.
Your work hours better than anyone.

Your favorite food and how often you eat it.
If you exercise.

When you go shopping and what you are ordering via mail.
Your friends and family and how often you hang out with them.

Who you are seeing and who you shouldn’t be seeing.

His job is to make your life as easy as possible by helping you solve little problems. Whether it’s holding packages, letting workers up to your apartment, holding doors open for you or whatever the case may be.

If he’s a superstar, he’ll take the time to learn about you, making sure to establish that emotional connection. He’ll go out of his way to greet you in the morning. He’ll run to open the door for you.

He’ll go that extra mile.

He acknowledges you and shows his appreciation and leaves you with a lasting impression as you take on the day.

My doormen have it all wrong. They think the world is owed to them. They are extremely unfriendly and don’t even open the doors. They think tips are just coming to them.

And what does one unhappy tenant do. They go and tell 10 other people. And they also find out if people are having the same issue. (In my case, yes.)

In fact, a good doorman is sincere 365 days a year 24/7 since the day you chose to move in. Sure, we all have our bad moments. You make it up next time, though. You might even apologize. We are all forgiving.

But, all of the sudden my doormen are being extra nice.

When a doorman just expects tips just because he’s a doorman and is being extra nice and it’s holiday time people sense that in .1 seconds. If he really cared about serving people and wanted to make a difference, people would sense that too.

They really would. And they’d appreciate it. And guess what? They’d tell 10 other people how much they love the doorman.

One of my doormen is nice and the rest, usually, seem to almost go out of there way to not acknowledge anyone.

Their job is simple: Open the door for people.

Anyone could be a doorman. What you do after that is what separates you from 99% of the other doormen.

So what am I going to do?

Well, last year I gave all of my doormen very generous tips. I was told that doormen can make your life a lot easier or harder.

Besides one guy, all of my doormen are never nice or go out of their way for me.

There is also this one porter who always runs to the door in the mornings, greets me by my name and always makes that extra effort. Since day one he has been sincere, genuine and customer serving.

This year I’m going to give him the biggest tip. He earns it. He wants it. And more importantly, he’s a super nice guy. His intentions are always to serve the customer (me).

And, I’m going to reward him by giving him my business (or, highest tip).

All I want from my other doormen is some effort. After all, what am I tipping them for? Show some effort. Give me the, “Good morning Adam! I hope you have a wonderful day!” That’s all I want. Is that so hard?

For some odd reason going that extra mile is too hard for most people.

To all my chairmen that read this. Yes, chairmen. Not doormen.

Good morning. I hope you enjoyed this post and have a wonderful day!

The Free Prize Inside the Box…

The free prize is the way smokers can pack cigarettes against the side of the package before they smoke them.

The free prize is the experience of service at the Ritz-Carlton, when what you paid for was a good night’s sleep.

The free prize is the change-counting machines at Commerce and Greenpoint Bank, when what you needed was a checking account.

The free prize is the way you girls feel after having a rough day of hair, nails, and of course, tanning.

The free prize is the way people stare at you while you’re cruising down Ocean Drive, in a Murcielago.

The free prize is the warm, fuzzy feeling you get inside after the first sip of your $5 Double Latte Mocha Frapa Guru Gilby.

The free prize is the way you get to blast your favorite song in the car, after downloading it or buying it.

The free prize is the way you and your friends feel at a club, drinking a $37.99 bottle of Grey Goose for $250.

The free prize is thinking you already lost weight, right after eating the first healthy meal for your new diet.

The free prize is how you appear when you put on a clean, crisp, freshly laundered shirt.

The free prize is the diesel thunk that the relays make when you turn on the Mark Levinson amplifier.

The free prize is the way you feel when you’re walking in the street, with your $1000 designer bag.

The free prize of living in NYC is getting to see all of the beautiful girls that miraculously afford to live in your building making $20,000 per year.

The free prize is the way your feet feel after putting on your UGG’s.

The free prize is how you get to pose in the mirror thinking you are on your way to being the next Arnold, after a gut wrenching 15 minute workout at the gym.

The free prize is the container that Method dish soap comes in.

Actually, the free prize inside is why we buy or use your product/service.

Now, give me my free prize!

Maybe you are supposed to read this…

Do you believe in God?

Seriously, do you believe in God?

Do you believe someone created this extraordinary, incredible, ridiculously amazing world?

There are millions of different theories. If people refer to the Big Bang theory and believe that’s what created the universe then think about this:

Out of nothing comes nothing.

For example, take an empty fish bowl. Put it on your dresser and keep it there for the rest of your life. I guarantee you that by the end of your precious life, nothing will be in it.

Someone or something would have to put objects in the fish bowl for something to occur.

Now, how about this:

I know what will happen if I take hundreds of mice and put them in a big circle with a lot of cheese on one end. They will all scurry and eventually find their way to the cheese. It may take longer for some. Some may die in the process. Some will get sidetracked, but most of the mice will find the cheese somehow.

They wouldn’t know if they were going to find the cheese during their journey.

And, as I’m standing over my little pretend experiment, I’d know where they’d end up. They wouldn’t.

The fact that I am able to take my thoughts and ideas and then process them to make my fingers press buttons on a keyboard that trigger a signal to transmit that touch so it appears on my screen so you can then read it and interpret it in your mind to form your own ideas and beliefs is mind boggling to me.

The human body is by far the most complex system on this planet. The systems, enterprises, ideas and creations that the human body has created are almost as remarkable.

Now, if I took a piece of red metal, in a shape of an octagon with the word STOP in the middle, a green metal post, a post hole digger and a few screws and scattered them on the street what would happen?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing would happen. Someone has to fasten the sign onto the post with the screws and dig a hole into the ground. I’d say the chance of the stop sign assembling itself and digging a hole for it is virtually zero.

All of that being written, all religions aside, wouldn’t it be crazy to think that someone or something didn’t create this?

Do you ever think what is this? What are we? What is this world? What is the purpose of life? Is someone or something making you sit at your computer right now and read these words? These words, too. And this.

I always do. It fascinates me. I’m a very curious person.

I certainly will not go through life and not question things.

I believe something or someone created this. Whether that idea is true or not is not for me to determine. Nor, is it for me to determine what you should believe.

But if God or someone/something is smart enough to do everything he has done already and take into consideration all of the analogies and ideas expressed above, do you think he knows what’s going to happen to us?

Destiny is a crazy thought.

Do you believe that everything that’s going to happen in your life is predetermined?

Is everything that happens to us inevitable? Does God want us to use our strengths and abilities? And, if we don’t, will he teach us a lesson?

I believe every single person on this planet has a Michael Jordan inside them. It just takes some longer than others to figure out what it is. Did God purposefully do this? Was this predetermined? Does he know what you are going to be doing in 5 years? In ten minutes? Tomorrow?

Are you meant to be reading this…right now?

Am I supposed to be writing this…right now?

I’d really love to hear you thoughts on this.

Maybe, just maybe, you are supposed to read this and comment on it…right now.

Just be

I was on the subway this morning coming back from a meeting with a client. It seemed as if everyone was in a good mood – looking forward to the holidays and the long weekend.

Everyone was sitting quietly awaiting their destination.

Then, this fairly young, good looking man walked through the adjoining subway car doors.

He was wearing army pants and a nice crisp army sweatshirt. It was evident he had pride in how he wore his army gear.

I offered him my seat. He looked at me and said, “No!” in a very shameful, almost embarrassed voice.

Immediately, this look came across his face.

A look of, “I can’t believe I’m about to do this and I really don’t want to do this.”

I just sensed it. He seemed disgraced at himself.

Right after that, in a loud enough voice, so everyone could hear him over the rumbling subway he said, “Hi. My name is Bill. A year ago I was in Iraq, serving our country and unfortunately, I lost my leg. My upper thigh is now becoming infected and I really need money to stop the infection from spreading. I’d really appreciate anything you can do to help! Thank you!”

As he was speaking you could hear a pin drop. I’ve never seen anything like this.

After he spoke about 90% of the people on the car pulled out their wallets and took out a dollar or two. It was amazing.

Bill wasn’t proud of what he had to do. He seemed disgraced at himself. I saw the look on his face right before he was about to do his shtick and as he was collecting money.

Bill’s expression on his face is an expression I will never forget.

I think everyone on the subway won’t forget it anytime soon, either.

All politics aside, sometimes, we need to just be. To live in the now and enjoy our surroundings.

We are all so lucky. Enjoy your health. Enjoy your friends. Enjoy your family. Enjoy.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

How do you see this? I want your input!

opportunityisnowhere

Either you saw it as opportunity is no where or (hopefully) opportunity is now here!

We can wait and wait and wait until it’s the perfect time no matter what our dreams are. There is never a perfect time. There never will be. Now is the time.

Every day people are making the best of their life. They see opportunity no matter where they are and are going after their dreams no matter what their situation, circumstance or fear.

These poor quality pictures were taken yesterday. Both on my way home from work. The first picture is of a break dancing team that managed to get over 150 people to stop in their tracks. And then got those people to give them a dollar or two. They were amazing.

The second picture is of a band. About 50 people were watching this band. And paid to do so.

Both of these groups are going after it. They want it. Whether they have nothing to lose or need the money, they are making the best of their current surroundings. Are you?

Opportunity is now here!

Here’s my question to you. I want you to fantasize a little. Day dream for a few minutes…

What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?

Let me hear it.

For all who say, “Exactly what I’m doing right now!” I admire you.

I’ll be there soon enough. And hopefully, we all will!

It’s amazing what people won’t do

Why do people wait 5 minutes for a spot that is only 1 minute closer to their destination?

In our get it now, need it now society, convenience plays a huge role in our lives. Companies have wisely responded with all sorts of free delivery policies and incentives.

In the city of New York, delivery has become expected. If you don’t deliver (and deliver for free) you are a dinosaur.

It’s astounding what people pay for convenience.

Room service is a service that makes money charging people for service to their room. Supermarkets in the city charge you a premium to deliver your just purchased goods.

Fresh Direct is a business built on convenience. They charge you a turkey sandwich and a frank for wanting groceries delivered to your door. Franks anyway, I think it’s a rip off.

But, people love it. People are lazy. People don’t want to move. And people don’t want to be bothered picking out their own fresh veggies.

I always thought the coolest thing about NYC was the fact that you could get McDonald’s delivered. What a McTreat!

How can you sell your products more conveniently to your customers?

If your customers are online be there. If they aren’t; find where they are. Then be there.

Marketing has become convenient marketing.

Make it as convenient as possible for your customer’s to buy from you. As soon as it’s annoying and, well, inconvenient, the purchase will be aborted.

Whatever you’re selling you must make it as easy as cake for your precious customers to get what they want from you. Any extra clutter is going to divert people.

You’re in business to serve people. Whatever product/service/idea you’re selling! Your number one priority should be to serve those people like they are family. You are nothing without them. Write this down:

I am nothing without my precious customers!

As a loyal reader to my blog (and I thank you!), I wouldn’t practice what I write about unless I made my posts easily accessible. The more convenient it is for you to get my posts, and the more choices you have to access my posts, the happier you will be. (Hopefully!)

3 ways you can read my blog:

  1. Continue to check my blog every 35 seconds for new posts
  2. Subscribe to my blog and get new posts in your RSS reader
  3. Or, subscribe for email updates and get an email directly in your inbox with the freshly baked, warm, gooey inside, chocolate melting new post. (“Mmmm!, that sounds delicious, how do I do that?”)

On the right side of my blog, after you scroll down a smidgen, you’ll see a box. Just enter your email address, click subscribe and you’ll get an email confirming your subscription. Open the email and activate your subscription.

That’s it.

And just in case you are hesitant, I’d never rent, sell, or share your email address with anyone.

And never is a strong word. But, that’s because I am nothing without my precious customers!

How about those Knicks? (Famous athlete picture included!)

JohnStarks.bmp
(Click on above link to see picture of John Starks!)

One of the luxuries of working for a company like Ernst & Young is definitely some of the perks.

Last night I had the good fortune of being invited to a Knickerbockers game.

These weren’t any old seats though. These were the corporate club suite seats.

The corporate club suite seats are very cool. There is a special entrance for club suite seat ticket holders to avoid all lines. These aren’t floor seats. They are the sky boxes all the way at the top of the Garden.

You walk into these corporate suites and it’s a whole other world up there. It’s like a miniature hotel room complete with every food and top shelf liquor you could possibly imagine.

The point of these corporate club suites must be for the experience. It’s a “Hey, you are paying top dollar as a client and we’ll hook you up and entertain you!” You scratch my back and I’ll scratch your back. Quid Pro Quo.

It has to be for the experience. I was the only one really watching the Knicks get crushed by the Spurs. Everyone else was fake laughing, boozin’, schmoozin’ and stuffing their face.

Don’t get me wrong. I did plenty of that, too.

But no one cared about the game until all of the sudden the huge deficit was cut to three points and the amazing deafening roar of the crowd began chanting, “Defense!” Boom. Boom. “DEFENSE!” Boom. Boom!

Sometimes people aren’t buying things for the actual product. They are buying the experience.

Cold Stone has great ice cream but is it that much better than good ol’ Ben & Jerry’s? (Ugh, how great is Half Baked!?!) You are paying a premium for the experience of watching them mix your ice cream in front of you.

There are thousands of businesses built on experiences. Hibachi is a restaurant built on an experience.

Sitting in the corporate club suite seats is a totally different experience than sitting on the floor. If you want to entertain and socialize with clients then the club suites seats are the way to go. Having unlimited gourmet food and alcohol is all part of the wonderful experience.

Here’s a thought exercise for you:

How can you reinvent your product/service/job so people want it for the experience?

How could you experience more experiences?

We’ve all heard people tell us, “At least do it for the experience.” Or, “You have to try it at least once!”

I think that’s very important. That’s called zooming. Or expanding your comfort zones.

If you don’t expand your comfort zones then how will you grow as a human being? You will constantly remain scared or fearful.

The best part of last night’s experience was meeting John Starks.

The photo above was taken right after I got his autograph.

I asked him to make it out to GuruGilbert.com and told him to check out my blog because he was going to be in it. He looked puzzled (but just in case)…

Johnny boy…Welcome! What did I tell you? I’m a man of my word. The picture came out good, right?

Oh, and make sure you tell all your friends about your picture on my lil’ site over here. Patrick, Charles, Anthony, Xavier, L.J, all of ‘em.

Horses wearing mounted Police officers

Every day as I walk to work I laugh.

I always crack up when I see the mounted police officers on their horses. They are scattered throughout Times Square. Is this a coincidence?

I think it’s phenomenal marketing.

These police offers are celebrities. They take pictures with tourists. I’ve seen lines of people waiting to pose with ‘Mister Ed’ and the police officer.

How do you even get to become a mounted police officer? Is it a privilege or a punishment? “Detective Hanratty the time has come. You have proved to us you can enforce the law. We want to reward you. How would you like to be a mounted cop?”

Do these mounted cops really do anything? Let’s face it, if something terrible happens they can’t abandon ship.

I couldn’t imagine the scene if a lady’s purse was stolen and the victim screamed, “Help, my purse was stolen!” What’s the cop going to do? Kick it into high gear, jump over cars, and run over people to catch the thief.

I don’t think so.

Maybe they help move along traffic but who’s listening to a cop on a horse?

I think they serve a very important (marketing) purpose.

To keep tourists happy and to keep them coming back to New York City so it remains as one of the most desirable tourist destinations in the world. It’s part of the Big Apple. It’s part of our culture.

What else do these mounted horses do besides attract and retain tourists (and maybe regulate traffic)?

There is a smell…

…and it smells like a $hit!